That's Yer Lottery

I dreamt last night that Sky News said
ďThe King is Queer, the Queen is Dead.Ē
And then intoned the words of dread:
ďThe country has been sold instead
To bingo callers, CamelotĒ
Maggie the family silver sold
Now Tony hands out all the gold
The futureís bright? The futureís cold.
Iím sorry ~ thatís yer lot.

Your last rightís gone, donít call a priest
This sceptred isle has been re-leased
Tagged with the barcode of the Beast
Your one-way ticket to the feast
Sponsored by good old Camelot
So Mr Starbuck takes the wheel
While Ronald serves a Crappy Meal:
Blandness with no hope of appeal ~
Iím sorry ~ thatís yer lot.

Though oil supplies have passed their peak
Consumption rises week on week.
One wonders what on Earth the meek
When their inheritance they seek
Will get from lofty Camelot.
One final wasteful short-haul flight
Goes mental into that good night
No use to rage at dying light
Iím sorry ~ thatís yer lot.

While other ways I would endorse,
My penís run dry, my throat is hoarse
My parody has run its course.
My arguments have little force
Against the might of Camelot
And so good luck to one and all
Six numbers and the bonus ball
Iíll see you in the shopping maul
That really is yer lot.


(In 2006, the UK lottery came up for tender and controversially, the Camelot deal was renewed,
despite claims that Richard Branson was offering a better deal,
with more of the profits going to the national coffers)